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CD1 CD2
1
[alarm bell ringing]
2
[man]
To the Bank of England! Quickly!
3
Surround the building!
4
You go that way! You go this way!
5
- [whistle blowing]
- There he is!
6
- Come on!
- After him, men!
7
[shouting]
8
[shouting]
9
That way!
10
- He came this way. I'm sure of it.
- Come on!
11
Come on, mates! Keep up!
12
Sorry, sir.
13
[metal clanging]
14
Today is the day I will finally achieve
what has been deemed impossible.
15
Man can break
the 50-mile-per-hour speed barrier.
16
And you're lucky
to be a part of it, Pierre.
17
- It's Jean Michel, sir.
- Yes.
18
We will make history.
Or we will die trying.
19
- Die?
- This is very exciting.
20
That's it!
I refuse to be catapulted,
21
electrocuted, or have my internal organs
disrupted any longer!
22
I quit!
23
He is a very sick man!
24
The electrocution was not my fault!
25
You refused to wear
the rubber underpants!
26
We're looking for a bank robber.
27
Is there no man brave enough
to be my valet?
28
Oh... Aah!
29
[groans]
30
I'm your new valet.
31
Uh... I must commend
the valet service
32
on their impeccable foresight.
33
But they know I only
accept French valets.
34
Yes. Oh! Oui! Oui!
35
I come from a long line
of French valets.
36
On my father's side.
Very, very French.
37
- But your accent.
- My father French. Never speak.
38
My mother Chinese and never shuts up.
All the children pick up her accent.
39
[steam hissing]
40
- [whistle blowing]
- Very well.
41
Will you be willing to risk your life
to challenge the laws of physics?
42
- Yes. Uh, and I can sing, too.
- Excellent. Pop this little hat on.
43
- He's got to be in here.
- He's this way!
44
[rumbling, hissing]
45
And the throttle in your
right hand controls the speed.
46
- How do I stop?
- Godspeed!
47
Uh-uh-uh...
48
Twenty-five miles per hour.
Yes, the pressure's stable-ish.
49
We need more speed, man.
50
Waah! Wee-yoo!
51
Forty miles per hour.
Hang on in there, my good man.
52
[screaming]
53
- Forty-seven.
- [groaning]
54
- Forty-eight.
- [whining]
55
Forty-nine.
56
Eureka! We've done it!
57
[screaming]
58
[screaming]
59
Uh...
60
Waaah!
61
I say, I say. Uh, good morning.
62
- I'm looking for a man with...
- Over here!
63
There he is. There's my valet.
64
- [screaming]
- [people screaming]
65
Sorry! New valet.
66
[screaming]
67
Whoa!
68
- [screaming]
- Whoa!
69
- Good morning.
- Good morning.
70
- [both screaming]
- You'll be able to let go any second.
71
The pack will run out of steam
72
in exactly three, two, one.
73
- Now.
- [screaming]
74
Look out!
75
- That was incredible!
- We've broken the human speed barrier.
76
[panting] Good-bye, sir.
77
It's been very nice valeting for you.
78
Let's... do it again soon.
79
Please, wait!
80
With you as my brave valet,
I can test all my inventions.
81
No!
82
[bobby] Spread out!
83
- Cover that...
- Yes, yes.
84
- I take the job.
- Splendid!
85
I can't wait to present
my results to the Academy.
86
[applause]
87
[man] Too kind. Too kind. Thank you.
88
And with this grant to develop
new applications for copper wire,
89
Dr. Ramsey invented this.
90
[gasps]
91
Needless to say,
the Royal Academy of Science
92
declared this crackpot
mentally incompetent,
93
and he was duly dispatched
to a lunatic asylum.
94
Sir. I have an urgent
announcement for you. Here.
95
Don't just stand there. Read it.
96
Oh. Um...
97
"lt is with great distress
98
that Scotland Yard announces
99
that the Bank of England...
has been robbed."
100
[crowd gasps]
101
My stolen Jade Buddha stolen?
You blighter!
102
You gave me every assurance that
the Bank of England was impenetrable!
103
Sir, sir, I said, "lmpregnable."
104
It's the same thing, you idiot!
105
- Please, please, not the quills!
- [shrieking]
106
Lord Salisbury!
107
Please contact General Fang
and inform her, no Buddha, no deal.
108
To forgo your obligation would
be dishonorable, Lord Kelvin.
109
A woman in the Royal Academy?
110
The Jade Buddha was delivered
by us to the Bank of England.
111
- What happens while in British hands...
- Is absolutely your concern.
112
Colonel Kitchner,
chief of Scotland Yard,
113
please inform General Fang
114
what other items were stolen
from the bank.
115
[whimpering] Nothing else.
116
Exactly. It seems
your little land dispute
117
has spilled over
onto our noble shore.
118
Until the Jade Buddha
is back in my possession,
119
you and your cause will receive no
British military assistance whatsoever.
120
Kitchner.
121
My agents will retrieve the Jade
Buddha once again, Lord Kelvin.
122
This time, do not let it
slip through your fingers.
123
A female general.
124
What sort of pathetic man
takes orders from a woman?
125
Cor!
126
- Come away from here.
- [boy] Oh, Dad. Can't we stay?
127
My wind-powered pulley system
128
circulates the house with fresh air.
129
Kitchen items are to be placed
on the white boat,
130
and the blue is for laundry.
131
But most importantly,
this supplies the house
132
with a running current of electricity.
133
Electricity.
134
This is my comprehensive
data schedule and list of regulations.
135
It's quite simple. You're never
to divert one iota from my plans.
136
I must live my life
with total efficiency...
137
to maximize my inventing capacity,
138
thus enabling me to do
the most I can for mankind.
139
Uh, Mr. Fogg, you are a noble,
precise gentleman.
140
Thank you. Uh.... Sorry.
What was your name? Ahem.
141
Passport. Too.
142
Passepartout.
143
[whistles]
144
[Passepartout] Bottled light.
145
A miracle.
146
Hardly.
147
Just undiscovered science from
an American named Thomas Edison.
148
It turns on with a whistle.
149
- [whistles]
- [machinery winds down]
150
- [Fogg] Please don't do that.
- [Fogg whistles]
151
Ah, I see your eye is drawn
152
to what I hope will one day
be my crowning achievement.
153
A giant moth?
154
- It's a flying machine.
- It can fly?
155
Yes.
156
No. But it will...one day.
157
One day it will transport people
through the air.
158
Perhaps over entire oceans.
159
[whistles]
160
Uh-oh.
161
I'm going to have
to make a rule for this.
162
Dear Father:
163
I will find the fastest way
back to China...
164
to make our village safe once again.
165
[ringing]
166
Passepartout?
167
Departure for the Royal Academy
of Science in two minutes.
168
Prepare my urban transport device.
169
Prepare my urban transport device.
170
It's the shoes
with little wheels on them.
171
It's the shoes
with little wheels on them.
172
Clear the way. Clear the way.
173
Mr. Fogg coming through.
Watch out! Watch out!
174
Excuse me. Out of way.
175
- Gangway.
- Fogg's arrived.
176
- Gangway. Ooh!
- Hey!
177
That makes it exactly
ten minutes before noon.
178
That will be all.
179
Gentlemen.
180
T oday I have proved that man
181
can break the 50-mile-per-hour
speed barrier
182
without disrupting
his internal organs.
183
[murmuring]
184
Where is your Royal Academy
of Science authorization?
185
What am I thinking? What a fool.
186
That would mean that you
were a real scientist!
187
[laughing]
188
By your definition,
a real scientist's objective
189
would be to prevent man from progress.
190
We live in a golden age, Fogg.
191
Everything worth discovering
has been discovered.
192
Yet ridiculous dreamers
like you insist
193
on a past filled with dinosaurs...
194
and evolution.
195
- [laughing]
- And on a future filled
196
with motorized vehicles,
197
radio waves,
198
and flying machines!
199
Confound it! The bloody
Bank of England is a madhouse!
200
Rumor has it the bloke's a foreigner.
An Asian chap.
201
Rumor has it the bloke's a foreigner.
202
Nothing.
203
Yes, I heard it was a Chinese fellow,
and he acted alone.
204
[whispering]
205
No. Actually,
they say he was Norwegian.
206
[murmuring]
207
In fact, though, it was a gang
of elderly Norwegians.
208
I heard it from a very reliable source
209
that it was a gang
of redheaded elderly Norwegians
210
with very tiny feet.
211
[murmuring]
212
It's about time
someone robbed that bank.
213
- [gasping]
- Like this very institution,
214
the Bank of England is outdated.
215
As usual, your contempt
for tradition is appalling.
216
You rest on your traditions,
if you prefer,
217
but, as with this bank robber,
progress waits for no one.
218
So now you're an expert
on the bank thief as well.
219
Give us the benefit
of your ineffable wisdom, Fogg.
220
Twenty-six minutes ago,
a ship left Dover for Paris.
221
From there, the thief
takes the Orient Express,
222
where he transfers to a steamer,
from lstanbul to lndia.
223
In little over a month,
that man could be in China.
224
If we're to believe Fogg's calculations,
he will have circled the globe
225
and returned to England in a fortnight.
226
[laughing]
227
Actually, by my calculations, it would
be closer to, uh, exactly 80 days.
228
Outstanding idea.
229
Well, then, Fogg,
230
Iet's see you circumnavigate the world
231
in 80 days.
232
I... That would be
a fruitless use of my time.
233
I'm on the verge of numerous...
234
countless... scientific breakthroughs.
235
You coward. Admit it.
It cannot be done.
236
It can! I could do it.
237
A wager.
238
- ?1 0,000.
- [clamoring]
239
Unlike you and your colleagues,
money does not inspire me.
240
I believe every man has his price.
241
Even you, o noble Phileas Fogg.
242
There must be something I could offer
that would be worthy of your time.
243
There is. Your position as head
of the Royal Academy.
244
[clamoring]
245
I could lead Britain
and the rest of the world
246
into a new age of progress
and discovery.
247
[laughing]
248
- Fair enough.
- What?
249
I, Lord Kelvin, hereby vow
250
to surrender my position as minister
of science to Phileas Fogg...
251
- No!
- No! No!
252
if he can circumnavigate
the globe...
253
in no more than 80 days.
254
But if he cannot,
255
he must never set foot
in this academy again,
256
he must tear down that abhorrent eyesore
he calls a laboratory,
257
and he must swear...
258
never to invent again.
259
Just as I always suspected, Fogg.
260
You promise so much, yet you deliver...
261
oh, nothing.
262
[laughing]
263
- I'll take your wager.
- What did you say?
264
I'll take your wager!
265
He did it.
266
Then it's done.
267
A man who has never set foot
out of England circling the globe.
268
[laughing]
269
This is going to be rather amusing.
270
History won't remember your amusement,
but it will be hard-pressed to forget
271
the moment I'm standing on the very top
step of the Royal Academy of Science.
272
- [bell tolls]
- By the strike of noon,
273
after l, Phileas Fogg,
have traveled around the world
274
in 80 days!
275
[cheering, applause]
276
[Fogg] Oh, dear.
277
Mr. Fogg, we all pack and ready to go.
Mr. Fogg, are you in here?
278
[crowd chanting]
Phileas! Phileas! Phileas!
279
- Uh...
- Mr. Fogg, are you well, sir?
280
Huh?
281
Uh, Passepartout.
282
Would you... sit with me a moment?
283
Yes, sir.
284
I risked everything,
my entire life's work.
285
For something you believe in.
286
Nothing could make
more sense than that, sir.
287
You are honorable, Passepartout.
288
But I'm afraid this was
a calamitous lapse of judgment.
289
- Mr. Fogg?
- Yes?
290
- Let your family...
- There is no one left to tell.
291
This house and my inventions
are all I have.
292
And a brave French valet that will help
you make it around the world in 80 days.
293
- You really believe we can succeed?
- Yes.
294
Yes. Yes. Yes!
295
You're mad. We'll be sliced to pieces
before we reach lndia.
296
[man] We're with you, sir!
297
Good luck!
298
Halt!
299
- Quite a contraption here, Mr. Fogg.
- Thank you, lnspector.
300
But I'm afraid I'm gonna have to detain
you and your valet until further notice.
301
This here doohickey is in violation
of the city's new vehicle code.
302
Vehicle code?
303
Code 431.
304
All vehicles
must be powered by horses.
305
Or other indigenous
quadruped creatures of the like,
306
excluding giraffes and...
307
You're driveling. Stand aside.
308
I'm about to embark upon
a journey around the world.
309
Not in this monstrosity,
you're not. No!
310
- Mm-mm.
- That's hot.
311
It's... Ow!
312
[shrieking, blubbering]
313
- [loud crash]
- [crowd moans]
314
Time to go.
We have a boat to catch.
315
Stealing a police vehicle is not
an acceptable way to begin our journey.
316
- Not stealing. Borrowing.
- Excuse us.
317
We're borrowing this vehicle
to catch our ship to Paris,
318
if someone could inform
the appropriate authorities.
319
Bloody hell! Me brain's leakin'!
320
[shrieks]
321
Ahh! Damn that nincompoop Fix.
322
What's the point of hiring
a corrupt police officer
323
if he can't abuse the law properly?
324
- Kitchner.
- Sir!
325
Tell Fix to pack his bags.
326
- He's going on a trip.
- Right away, sir.
327
[speaking Chinese]
328
[ship's whistle blowing]
329
Hmm. Smart man.
330
Passepartout, tell this
impudent fellow we must
331
Ieave within six and a half hours, or we
miss our connection in Constantinople.
332
Yes, sir. Please.
We are in a great hurry.
333
- Passepartout?
- Yes?
334
In French.
335
[sighs]
336
Sacre bleu, la champignon,
337
chateau, bien, francoise, voila,
ooh-la-la, foie de gras.
338
- What did he say?
- Uh...
339
He say...
340
- What?
- He says not to worry.
341
The next train will leave in five hours.
Good time for sightseeing.
342
Passepartout, this is
a scientific expedition, not a holiday!
343
I will not miss this train.
344
[bell jingles]
345
Ah!
346
- Very amazing.
- What?
347
What does it say?
348
Eddie Thomason will be
showing his inventions.
349
Thomas Edison? Here in Paris?
350
What a chance for you
to meet another great inventor.
351
I would quite like to tell him
about my whistle modification.
352
Good idea.
353
See? Exposition. Science.
354
[speaking Chinese]
355
I assure you these are not
the works of Thomas Edison.
356
Uh, I think he is
somewhere around here.
357
Wait a moment. This isn't science.
358
This is art.
359
- Yeah.
- Hmm.
360
That painting is highly inaccurate.
361
[woman] It's not
supposed to be accurate.
362
The artist views reality
through imagination
363
rather than simply recording it.
364
It is called "lmpressionism."
365
Well, um, I'm not impressed.
366
Trees are not violet,
grass is not charcoal,
367
and a man cannot...
368
fly.
369
You feel something.
370
You dream of flying.
371
Or of naked men.
372
- Sometimes.
- Ah.
373
The flying. N-N-Not the men.
374
I am glad you like my painting.
Monique La Roche.
375
Phileas Fogg. I must say, it's a lot
better than these amateurs.
376
What did he say?
377
- Oh, no.
- [speaking French]
378
[clears throat]
379
[speaking French]
380
Non.
381
Goodness. What was that all about?
382
Well, a wealthy gentleman
bought my painting for a lot of money.
383
Champagne for everyone!
384
[shouting in Chinese]
385
I'm still looking for Mr. Eddie.
Nice painting.
386
Have you considered
a career in schematic drawing?
387
No. It would be far too limiting.
388
At least your work
shows genuine promise.
389
Thank you. Those I painted
many months ago.
390
I was lacking inspiration.
391
I found some men
to help me find Mr. "Edimon."
392
- This way.
- Thank you. Thank you.
393
[shouting in Chinese]
394
He's very eager.
395
[shouting] Get him!
396
Oh, no, no, no, no.
Oh, it's terrible, no?
397
No, no, it's...
398
- clever.
- Oh.
399
Hmm. Yes.
400
- He's a clown.
- Mm-hmm.
401
And yet...
402
he's incredibly angry.
403
The irony is, uh, terrifying.
404
- Is that good?
- Is it?
405
Ah, this is interesting.
406
Without opposable thumbs,
a dog could never play poker.
407
Yes, they can.
408
Where have you seen
a dog playing poker?
409
Right there.
410
Perhaps I'm not the best judge.
411
[screaming]
412
Bandits! They come to take away
all the paintings!
413
- Quickly! Come this way!
- Passepartout!
414
Go, go, go!
415
Thank you, Miss La Roche.
You may just have saved our trip.
416
- There you are.
- I would, uh...
417
- I would like to repay you.
- Take me with you.
418
- What?
- I'm stifled here. Pigeonholed.
419
They think of me only
as a coat-check girl!
420
- Why?
- Because I am the coat-check girl.
421
- Ah.
- Look.
422
The leading art critic in Paris.
423
Look what he wrote
about one of my paintings.
424
- I can't read this. It's French.
- I wish I couldn't.
425
Why do you carry it?
426
When I do succeed,
I can throw it in his face, but for now,
427
I need a world journey to inspire me.
428
I'm inspired to get us
back on schedule.
429
Let's see. Wind velocity
approximately twelve knots,
430
factoring in air density...
431
Outstanding!
432
Passepartout, onward! Ah.
433
There we go. Passepartout,
tell him to keep the change.
434
Uh... [indistinct French]
fromage, por favor.
435
We are going around
the world in 80 days!
436
[speaking French]
437
The balloon cannot
support all this weight!
438
Your hot air should compensate, no?
439
- Get off!
- [shouting]
440
- What are they doing?
- They're being disorderly.
441
Hey! Let go! Let go!
442
Hey! Passepartout!
My valise! It has all my money in it.
443
- [Monique shrieks]
- [screams]
444
Hey, lady, lady, lady! It's my bag.
445
No, that is my bag.
446
No, that's not your bag. It's my bag!
447
- No!
- You crazy.
448
Yes.
449
[yelling, laughing] That tickles!
450
[speaking Chinese]
451
You took my bag.
452
Mr. Fogg! [grunts]
453
- Good catch!
- Thank you.
454
- [yelling]
- [people screaming]
455
- [shouting]
- [grunting]
456
Ooh!
457
Those are the gallery bandits.
458
[chuckling] Oh, yes!
459
Ah.
460
He stole my purse!
This devil stole my purse!
461
My bag! He took my... Ah!
462
- We've stolen that old lady's purse.
- Huh. Here.
463
We must help Passepartout.
How do I make this go lower?
464
What are you doing?
Decrease the overall weight...
465
- That's not going to work.
- Yes, it is.
466
Physics, no?
467
Yes.
468
[yelling]
469
Ahhh...
470
Ooh! Ay! Owww.
471
Bonjour.
472
- [women laughing]
- Bonjour.
473
- Eh?
- Bye-bye!
474
Wake up, lady! Wake up, lady!
475
[onlookers shriek]
476
Wake up! Lady, wake up!
477
[gasps]
478
- Bye, mama.
- Merci.
479
Bye, baby.
480
- Ohh...
- [screaming]
481
Very impressive. I'd have let go by now.
482
The statue's grabbing his trousers.
483
I don't think it's doing it on purpose.
484
- Oh, dear.
- [screaming]
485
[Passepartout] Help!
486
Well done, Passepartout.
487
We're still on schedule
despite those dogged thieves.
488
Yes, yes. Thank you.
489
Those art thieves
seemed to recognize you.
490
- I look like someone they know.
- Some other Frenchman, perhaps?
491
- So, where can we drop you off?
- We're not stopping.
492
Once we land to board
the Orient Express, you are free to go.
493
Thank you so much.
494
- For what?
- I'm free to go with you.
495
I did not say you were free to come.
496
- I said you were free to go.
- Where?
497
- Anywhere.
- Thank you. I will go with you.
498
- No, you will not, Miss La Roche.
- Monique.
499
- No, you will not, Miss La Roche.
- Monique.
500
Miss... Monique!
501
There! Now we are getting along.
502
[Monique] Comme c'est beau.
503
C'est magnifique.
504
[gasps]
505
Toutes ces couleurs.
506
Look at the sunrise.
There is only one word for it.
507
- "Magical."
- Miss La Roche!
508
I refuse to allow you
to continue traveling with us.
509
I'm not traveling with you.
I'm making my own way.
510
Maybe you shouldn't travel with me.
511
This is what happens
when you leave your home.
512
You meet... people!
513
[chuckles]
514
Why are you keeping up this ruse?
515
Perhaps I should inform Mr. Fogg,
and together he and I can speculate.
516
A very sacred object
was stolen from my village.
517
I have taken it back.
518
Incroyable.
519
For many centuries, the Jade Buddha
has protected my people.
520
It has never left our village until now.
521
And those art thieves. Who are they?
522
The Black Scorpions.
They work for an evil warlord. Fang.
523
She wants the Buddha
so she can take over my village.
524
I must return the Jade Buddha
to protect Lanzhou.
525
Mr. Fogg is the fastest way.
526
Perhaps, then,
we can help one another.
527
I will keep your secret,
and you convince Mr. Fogg
528
to allow me to travel
the world with you.
529
Keep this Dummkopf in his seat,
or we throw him off!
530
Merely pointing out if they coordinated
their coal-shoveling technique,
531
- they could maximize our speed.
- [chuckling]
532
When we reach Constantinople, I suggest
you board a train we are not on.
533
- Uh, Mr. Fogg, she must come with us.
- And why is that?
534
Uh, we just discovered that we are
related from the same family.
535
I'm her father's second cousin's sister
on my mother's side. French.
536
Monsieur Fogg. If I make the train
go faster, I can come with you, oui?
537
[chuckles] Yes.
538
I bid you farewell, Miss La Roche.
539
[whistle blowing]
540
- [engine chugging faster]
- [chuckles]
541
[Monique, engineers laughing]
542
If there's anything else you would like,
just let us know, Miss La Roche.
543
Ah! Voila.
544
Champagne with your first-class seats,
Mademoiselle La Roche.
545
Merci.
546
- Champagne?
- No, thank you.
547
- Merci.
- Monsieur.
548
[sighs]
549
[Phileas] A tea?
550
Okay.
551
How to make English tea.
552
Precisely 96 degrees.
553
Ooh.
554
Excuse me, sir.
555
- Fogg's valet!
556
- A jade Buddha!
- This is not a jade Buddha.
557
- Oh, yes, it is!
- You're right. But I'm not a valet.
558
Oh. Really?
559
Owww!
560
Me bloody nose!
561
Let me in!
You're gonna pay for scorchin' me willy!
562
Heh-heh-heh-heh. Now I gotcha.
563
Ow! Oh! Ow!
564
Ahhh!
565
You're under arrest!
566
[screaming]
567
- [thudding]
- Ah! Ooh! Ow!
568
- Sorry!
- [screaming]
569
Why the devil are we stopping?
570
Prince Hapi would be honored
to have Fogg
571
and his traveling companions
at his banquet.
572
[Fogg] How very flattering.
573
But please inform Prince "Happy"
that we are on a very tight schedule.
574
Prince Hapi demands it.
575
Then Prince Hapi
will have to get accustomed
576
to not getting everything he wants.
577
[speaking Turkish]
578
It is magnificent.
579
Mr. Fogg, his house
is even bigger than yours.
580
His collection, his taste...
It is exquisite.
581
Yes, it is.
582
Not good.
Very old. Look. Broken.
583
And where is His Highness?
584
Oh. The prince is also
a talented musician.
585
If I did nothing
but lounge about the palace,
586
I'd learn to pluck a few notes.
587
Let's make this brief.
I'll pose for photographs,
588
wearing a turban,
holding an atlas...
589
[Hapi] Mademoiselle.
590
How magical that our paths should cross.
Do you believe in fate?
591
Is that what you call it
592
when one stops a train
and kidnaps its passengers?
593
Phileas Fogg.
594
Please forgive me,
595
but I feel like Aphrodite herself
descended to Earth.
596
What is a ravishing
woman like you...
597
- I never think when I'm naked.
- I do. In the bath.
598
- Yes. Well, I mean...
- No!
599
Don't touch it!
600
- That is my most treasured possession.
- I was only pointing. I was just...
601
Don't even point.
602
Rodin.
603
Yes. A Rodin.
604
Oh.
605
I have never seen a more beautiful...
muscular form.
606
Well, I can assure you,
I'm in much better shape now.
607
Incroyable. It is a sculpture of you!
608
Yes.
609
[Monique] "Hapi Birthday.
Your pal, Rodin."
610
- Come, my dear. Let us dine.
- Yes.
611
Ah, Mr. Fogg, please join us.
612
No, sorry. We are on a tight schedule.
613
We will join you, actually.
But just one drink.
614
[Hapi, Monique laughing]
615
After the duke and the duchess
sat down in the bath,
616
I realized I forgot
to put on my bathing suit.
617
I'm such a fool.
618
Always embarrassing myself
in front of visiting dignitaries.
619
But you know how that can be,
right, Phil?
620
[chuckles] Uh, yes.
621
Uh, it's Phileas, actually.
622
So, Foggy, tell me.
I heard you're an inventor.
623
Well, I try to apply myself
to thinking of new ways
624
to help better mankind,
if that's what you mean.
625
Well, I'm not an inventor,
626
but I did develop a new way
of irrigating dry land
627
so that no one in my kingdom
ever has to be hungry.
628
Oh.
629
Mr. Fogg invented wheelie shoes.
630
Not now, Passepartout.
631
Oh.
632
[Monique] Mmm.
633
- Miss La Roche.
- Hmm?
634
It is mesmerizing,
the way your face illuminates.
635
Oh...
636
Her discoloration could be
an allergic reaction
637
or a mild form of hives.
638
[scoffs, snorts]
639
Although I've noticed a certain
640
Iuminescent glow about her
complexion when she's drawing.
641
And sometimes, when she's...
concentrating on her latest work,
642
her ears will actually flutter.
643
- It's rather fetching.
- Guess who else was in this bath.
644
U.S. President Rutherford B. Hayes.
645
Shouldn't we be going?
We have a schedule to keep.
646
Thank you for your hospitality.
647
It's been absolutely fascinating,
but I'm afraid we must push on.
648
Yes.
649
Very well.
The gentlemen are free to go.
650
But Miss La Roche...
stays here with me.
651
- To be my wife.
- Hmm?
652
Yes. Wife number seven.
653
- You have seven wives?
- One for each day of the week.
654
- This is absolutely ridiculous!
- No more talk!
655
Prince Hapi has spoken!
656
Well, we did say one drink.
Passepartout, we're leaving.
657
I can tell when we're not wanted.
658
Monsieur Fogg!
659
- [whimpers]
- Do Tuesdays work for you?
660
- Good-bye.
- [Passepartout] Thank you!
661
No!
662
[Phileas] Halt!
663
Or Hapi gets smashed!
664
Please! Anything but my statue of me!
665
Miss La Roche,
please join us, if you will.
666
- All of you, drop your weapons.
- Do as he says!
667
- Get in the tent.
- Everybody!
668
- Now!
- Let's go. Come on.
669
Now, take off your clothes
and throw them... Uh...
670
I assure you the statue is not
armed... harmed in any way.
671
- Get them!
- [guards shouting]
672
His arm!
673
Thank you, Phileas.
That was very heroic.
674
Yes, and needlessly time-consuming.
675
This is exactly why
I should never have let you come along.
676
[Hapi] Kill them!
677
[yelling] I want my arm!
678
[crying] No!
679
Sir! I've received a telegram
from lnspector Fix.
680
- A-ha!
- According to him,
681
the bank thief and Fogg's valet
are the same man.
682
Fogg doesn't realize
he's transporting the bank thief!
683
Or does he?
He did leave town in quite a hurry.
684
Wouldn't you say, Lord Rhodes?
685
Indeed, Lord Salisbury.
686
Eh, evading arrest,
687
stealing a police vehicle,
688
sounds rather incriminating to me.
689
One can almost deduce
690
this entire bet was merely a ruse
691
to facilitate his escape.
692
- Don't you agree, Lord Kelvin?
- Yes.
693
Brilliant, Lord Salisbury.
694
I shall name a beef-related entree
after you in your honor! Kitchner!
695
- Sir!
- lnform your men at Scotland Yard
696
that Phileas Fogg is without a doubt
the man who robbed the Bank of England!
697
- Where are they now?
- They're taking a train across lndia,
698
from Bombay to Calcutta.
699
Thank God we own lndia!
700
I want their faces
in every police station,
701
army barracks, post office,
railway station and outhouse in lndia!
702
We're going to stop Fogg
and get my Jade Buddha back
703
by any means necessary!
704
[speaking lndian dialect]
705
Agra is where we will capture them!
706
Intercept them at Agra!
707
Carry on, Cutter!
708
Move it! Move it! Fall in!
709
[train whistle blowing]
710
[children laughing]
711
And they were
the greatest kung fu boxers.
712
T en Tigers of Canton.
713
Brothers in arms.
714
They fought to keep order
and justice in China.
715
The most famous of T en Tigers
is Wong Fei Hung.
716
- [children oohing]
- [goats bleating]
717
[Passepartout] Armed with
only bamboo sticks...
718
It's salivating on... please.
719
Is this your goat?
720
Did they really fight like tigers?
721
Each Tiger have their own
animal fighting style.
722
- Like tiger.
- [laughing]
723
Snake. Snake head, snake tail,
snake mouth, snake tongue!
724
Where are my calculations?
725
Monkey!
726
The goat! Passepartout, I'm being
attacked by a ferocious animal!
727
- It has small horns.
- Sorry, Mr. Fogg.
728
Please keep that inconsiderate
beast away from me.
729
And refrain from ridiculous anecdotes.
730
Why do you not like his story, Mr. Frog?
731
It's Fogg. Phileas Fogg.
732
How could a man learn to defend himself
by watching animals behave like...
733
- animals?
- It is famous legend.
734
- A ridiculous legend.
- Most legends are born from truth.
735
Yes.
736
But all truths are born from facts.
737
Solid, tangible facts
that can be calculated
738
and written down on paper.
739
- And then eaten by a goat.
- [children laughing]
740
Mr. Feelsillious,
when I tell the story
741
of the man who circled
the entire world in 80 days,
742
would that not be a legend?
743
Only if the man's name
was Feelsillious Frog.
744
- What the blazes is it now?
- Come this way! Come on!
745
Look sharp, now. Get 'em!
746
Find these men!
747
Uh-oh. Time to go. They seem to think
we robbed the Bank of England.
748
Preposterous. This is a desperate
attempt by Lord Kelvin
749
to impede my journey.
750
I am a British citizen.
I have nothing to fear.
751
- [gunshots]
- [people screaming]
752
Except bullets.
753
Listen up!
Have you seen these men?
754
Come on!
755
Any word on the bank thieves, sir?
756
They were on the train.
Keep your rifles ready.
757
They won't get past us, sir!
758
Ladies, have you seen these two men?
759
Look closely. They're very dangerous.
760
[Phileas] They're everywhere!
This is not going to work!
761
- [Passepartout] Just act like ladies.
- [Monique] Not a problem.
762
[in high voice] Hello. Hello! Ah.
763
- I feel faint.
- Phileas, women are not that weak!
764
- No, but I am.
- [bag hits ground]
765
Hello, darling.
What can I do for you, eh?
766
[gibberish]
767
What nice hand,
nice eye, nice hair...
768
- Hang about!
- [screams]
769
[groans]
770
Mr. Fogg, what are you doing?
This is no time to sleep.
771
Stop, stop.
772
Go, go, go! Get us out of Agra quickly.
773
[Monique] Passepartout, we did it.
774
Hey, wrong way.
775
Ah!
776
- [shouts]
- [screaming]
777
[snarling]
778
Phileas? No! No!
779
[metal creaking]
780
Aah! Run! Run, Passepartout!
781
Ah! Ah!
782
Ahhh!
783
Fogg's valet! Heh!
784
- What are you doing?
- Now I gotcha!
785
Hand over the Jade Buddha!
786
[Fix] Oh!
787
[snarling]
788
You're under arrest! Whoa!
Watch me plums! Ooh!
789
Now you get him very mad! Let's go.
790
Stop, or I'll arrest you as well!
791
- [roaring]
- [shrieking]
792
[Passepartout] Run!
793
- Which way?
- Down!
794
- [Fix screams]
- Again!
795
[Passepartout] Down!
796
Jump!
797
[yowling]
798
- Go, go, go!
- [Fix] What's upsetting him?
799
- He wants the Jade Buddha!
- Then give it to him!
800
- Phileas, wake up!
- Please, please. You must go.
801
- My husband will be home soon.
- Phileas!
802
[yelling]
803
Ow! Ay!
804
Phileas, help!
805
Leave her alone! I'll protect you!
806
[groans] Ah!
807
I'm here, my dear.
808
Uh, that stumble was
simply to buy me time.
809
This cane is not as it appears.
810
If I depress this button, it would
deploy a weapon more deadly than yours.
811
This... is...
812
a strange knife.
813
Isn't it a sextant?
814
Yes.
815
Huh.
816
- Are you all right, my dear?
- Phileas, that was so unlike you. Ah!
817
[officer] You men, come with me!
818
You'd better put this on.
819
Perhaps I should wear
women's clothing more often.
820
- [groaning]
- Oh.
821
We should run.
822
- What, now?
- Mm-hmm.
823
Yes, we should run.
824
[roaring]
825
- Break down the door!
- Okay.
826
No, not me brains!
827
[yelling]
828
- Give me the Jade "Bu-ddha"!
- Okay, okay.
829
What's "Bu-ddha"?
830
Get ready to jump! Now!
831
It is him, the Englishman
who robbed the Bank of England!
832
He's escaping in that palkee-garry!
833
[soldier] Hey, there he is!
834
They'll check all trains heading east.
835
If we could make it to the coast, we
can't sail into Singapore or Hong Kong.
836
- They're both British colonies.
- Does England own everything in Asia?
837
Not China. Not yet.
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